it's OKAY to not know what you want to study! But also...how the hell do I pick?

      My best friends know how to call my bullshit. It usually looks like this:

      Me: "GUYS I FINALLY FIGURED OUT WHAT I WANT TO STUDY, LIKE ACTUALLY THIS TIME"

      Them: ok sure but no u didn't 

      (and they were always right)

       My whole life, I've toyed with different passions. I am scattered all across the board when it comes to things I'd love to study. If I could, I would major in like, 57 different things. The world is so dang interesting! I remember when I was a kid, telling people I wanted to be a police officer, an artist, and an astronaut. I am, well, none of those things. I think I would apologize if I had to pull someone over, I have the artistic talent of my older brothers, and if I get bladder shy in public, I doubt I can pee in fucking OUTER SPACE. 

       As I got into high school, my interests narrowed down a bit. When I got asked the inevitable "what are you going to study?" here's a bit of what my thought process looked like: "Environmental science and journalism. OH and marine biology, too. But also I love writing, so maybe creative writing. Or communication arts. CRAP I forgot about anthropology. And Spanish. But maybe something more practical. Education. BUT--" and I would go on and on and on. My answers were endless. How the heck am I sposed to narrow and focus in on just ONE interest? I have like, a BAJILLION. AND I have to choose one that keeps me out of a cardboard box. Not that I'd mind a cardboard box, I just would like a sturdier, waterproof one if anything. 

      Deciding what to study is a terrifyingly huge adult decision that is put on teenagers with no real world experience. It seems like one day, you're just supposed to...know. And no one really helps you figure it out. But I realized it really isn't a terrifyingly huge adult decision. Well, it is, but it may not have as big of an impact as you think. 

      What you choose to study does not make or break you. There's an overarching worry that hovers over each student that your major completely determines your life path. No, no it does not. Your major, your college degree, if you choose to pursue one (college is not for everyone, and that is okay!) does not determine your path, but simply opens doors for one. If you don't want to, you will likely not end up in your field of study in a few years, unless you are studying something specialized like medicine or engineering. Your education is fluid and will transfer to a lot of different areas. Do not worry if you graduate and find you didn't study the "right" thing. You can work your way to where you want to be. Almost everyone does.

      Also--choosing a major based on what you're truly passionate about will yield you higher results and happiness than choosing based on money. You will make money in any field you are in. Who knows how much, but I can guarantee that money will not keep you motivated for a lifetime of a career. A sense of purpose paired with your passion will. 

     But also, to be fair, I know...literally nothing. I haven't even declared a major yet. It took me a while of bouncing between environmental science, wildlife ecology, journalism, communication arts, English, and some other random majors but none of them felt quite right. I even thought about applying to improv comedy school in Chicago. HA! Like that woulda worked out. Someone musta REALLY been boostin' my ego in high school. I think one person laughed at one of my jokes my senior year of high school and I RAN with it. 

      I've always been looking for the right mix of helping people and having fun. God, I cannot work an office job. But, I have some pretty lofty goals. I cannot be defined by one aspiration or career--I want to try and live them all. Only the fun ones, specifically...

      I want to impact and work with individual's--I want to work with people of all backgrounds, work with the environment, wear down my shoes, travel, write, share some crazy stories, have a damn adventurous life, hopefully squeeze some music in there, and be working towards bettering people's lives all the while. 

      Right now, I am fairly certain I will be studying Community and Nonprofit Leadership and Environmental Studies (or Spanish.) (or...) Damnit, there I go again!
      But, the point is, your choice is not determining of your entire life. You are much more powerful and able than what your diploma says. Your career path may not be linear, but hey, that's the fun of it, right?